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Summer 2013 Index - The "Unfinished" Issue*
Article:
Defending Cap'n Crunch
* This issue was lacking the full content of our usual publications and therefore was never advertised as being published, so its existance may come as a surprise for some.
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Defending Cap'n Crunch
by Topher
 This year marks the 50th Anniversary of Cap'n Crunch. Created in 1963, Cap'n Horatio Crunch sails the S. S. Guppy with his first mate, Seadog (1963), and his crew of four kids (Alfie, Carlyle, Dave, and Brunhilde). Their mission is to keep the cargo hold of cereal from falling into the hands of Jean LaFoote the Barefoot Pirate (1968) or suffering other hazards.
Slogans included: "Cap'n Crunch stays crunchy even in milk." and "It contains corn for punch and oats for crunch, sweetened just right."
Animation and storylines were courtesy Jay Ward Studios. Daws Butler, was the original voice of The Cap'n and crew member Alfie. June Foray played all the female characters as well as two of the kids on the Guppy's crew. Paul Frees was the narrator. Bill Scott voiced Jean LaFoote, crew member Dave, and Harry S. Hippo.
There has been over 100 varieties of Cap'n Crunch cereal.
This Summer, a smear campaign has alleged that Crunch is not a Cap'n, but a Commander instead, noting that he sports 3, not 4 stripes on his uniform. While three stripes would indeed seem to indicate an O-5 pay grade of a Commander rather than the 0-6 pay grade of a 4-striped Captain in the United States Navy (and several other country's navies), keep in mind he is not in the U.S. Navy.
Cap'n Crunch is master and commander of the USS Guppy. He has a faithful crew (Alfie, Carlyle, Dave, and Brunhilde) and a first mate (Seadog) who recognize him as Captain, as does his primary foe (Jean LaFoote). For decades he has sailed the Milk Sea keeping his cereal safe from thieves and soggies so that we can benefit from his selfless service to mankind. Anyone so qualified is by definition the Captain of his ship. Just as Captain Kirk (who also wore 3 stripes on his sleeve) was Captain of the USS Enterprise, Horatio Crunch Jr. is Captain of the USS Guppy.
Of note, the honorable Cap'n had actually once been promoted to Admiral (like his father Admiral Horatio Crunch Sr. before him) and was assigned a desk job at Crunch Headquarters, but after a major mishap involving 2 newly promoted captains, he requested a demotion back to Cap'n where he thought he could do more good. This guy is a legend and if he's modest enough to only require 3 stripes on his sleeve, by golly, that's good enough for me!
For more on Cap'n Crunch, his cereals, and the assorted characters that he encountered, see Topher's Breakfast Cereal Character Guide.
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The Boxtop is a non-commercial publication. It is not affiliated with or endorsed by any cereal or company. All of the names, characters, brands, and icons included here are trademarks of their respective parent companies and cannot be used for commercial purposes. Enjoy breakfast and support your favorite characters! |
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